Guilty Eating

Bible Verse:
But if you refrain from vowing, you will not incur guilt.
-Deuteronomy 23:22

Devotional:
Just about every night I tell myself and God that the next day, I won't nibble between meals or eat the wrong things. But sometime during that next afternoon my hunger-light goes on and I start sneaking crackers with peanut butter, or cookies, or slices of cheese that get bigger each time.
When i say "sneaking" I don't mean I'm hiding from anyone. Nobody's there to see what I do. But I eat with a stealthy, huilty attitude because of my vow the previous evening. And the guiltier I feel, the more inclined I am to keep eating. For comfort's sake.
I fail at a lot of little pledges: This weekend I'll clean out all the closets; tomorrow I'll begin studying a foreign language; next week I'll start scrimping and saving for a trip to France....
The Bible says if you don't vow, you don't sin by failing. I think I set so many lofty goals for myself that i can't function when it comes to small ones, like taking my vitamins every day or skipping those afternoon snacks. I've got to sort out attainable goals and then take the first step toward them.

For further reflection:
1. Do you constantly promise yourself that you'll do the unrealistic?
Yes! Everyday. No snacks today; I will clean the house from top to bottom in a manner that would make my grandma proud; I won't spend a dime today; I will pray contiuneously today...I make so may and I fail at every one of them, that I no longer believe that I can attain ANY goal that I set for myself! I have to change that thinking!
2. Is one of those vows connected to eating?
Only one? Just about every one of them is connected to eating in some manner or the other. What else is new? I am always making a vow about food, always!
3. Would it help you to live "vow free"?
I'm not sure what that would mean. I need to be able to set a realastic goal, and work towards it, but ism't settign a goal a vow to make it to that goal. i mean I guess I set the goal and then work towards it, just not laying in bed at night so disgusted with myself for eating that day that i yell out to God..."I promisse you I will not eat tomorrow"...Ummmm, now that I have my head around this yes, it would feel so much better not to feel guilt if I mis-stepped, but knowing that I can still reach my goal in spite of the mis-steps.

Prayer:
Lord Jesus, You came to take away our quilt. Help me to stop vowing the unrealistic so i won't always feel like I'm falling short. Amen.

No more vows or promises to do anything. I will set goals, attainable goals and then move forward to them, once reached, I will set new goals! Small steps.

My Goals:
1. To increase my water intake. -done! I drank six 1/2 liter bottles on Tuesday, four on Wednesday and I have had two so far today. Each and every day has been more than I usually drink, since before I would drink diet soda all day and no water. Since I have met this goal, I need to revise it into number 2.
2. To drink at least 64 ounces of water each day.
3. To limit myself to ONE diet soda per day.
4. To go for a walk at least TWICE a week.
5. To lose at least TWO pounds each week. -this is a healthy, realistic goal. If it's more than that it is okay, but I am not going to push myself to try to lose more.
6. To lose TEN pounds by 6-25-07.

I am going to take it small. i know my overall goal is over 100 pounds to lose, but if I take it in 10 pound steps, I can reach it. It looks easier in writing and I won't feel so overwhelmed by the total number. Now I have my first set of goals in writing! I can't ignore them, because they are written here for me and everyone to see.