Divorce Stress

I've been married for a little over 18 years now, dated my husband for 4 years before that, so we have been together 22 years! That's a long time. But right now we are struggling with the stress of a divorce, and it's not even ours, it's my dad's fourth one.

Back in June he called to tell me that his current wife had filled for divorce and that although he was still staying out at the house with her, things were bad. She had a new boyfriend that she was sneaking into town to stay with all weekend, and expecting him to take care of the horses and the house. So I started going down and picking him up for the weekend and bring him to our house.

She filled for the divorce on May 25th, and they elected to go into mediation instead of hiring attorneys. Their first court appointment was July 6th, and although not much went on, they basically turned in a list of what each party wanted to the mediator and went home, they got in an argument on the drive home, basically because Dad was pissed off that she came into court covered in hickeys from her boyfriend. he kicked him out of the car an mad him walk home, this is a 63 year old man, not in the best of health in the heat of July! He called me and I came and picked him up, and he has not been back out to "her" house since.

Their second court appearance before the mediator took place on August 31st, and although they were called in few minutes before their original court time, by 3 minutes past court time they were done. She refused to look at or agree to any of the options that my Dad presented so the mediator told them it would have to go to court! Talk about being mad!

We called around that day and got an appointment with an attorney and we talked it through, there really isn't much to the whole thing, in fact there are no kids, just a house with a mortgage, a personal loan and some farm equipment, most of which came from my grandparents when they passed away and then the horses. So the attorney said this should be pretty simple and pretty fast.  Saturday w get a letter in the mail stating that she had retained and attorney and that he had filled for a continuance. NO! We had purposely not notified her that we had retained an attorney yet to keep her for getting scared and filing for a continuance. There is really not that much to divide.

So this morning I called the attorney to let him know and see if there was anything we could actively do to try to get the continuance not granted. I mean, we only hired our attorney a week before she hired hers and she is the one who originally filed the petition, so she should already have everything she needed worked out. right?

I am so stressed out over this, and it is making my Dad mad and stressed, and it worries me that this is the kind of thing that might make him fall off the wagon again, and this is NOT the time for that to happen, but there is a part of me that is thinking she is pushing just to see if she can't get him to fall of the wagon, just to say see, he's not fit. But then again they don't have kids so it's just the horses they are dividing, but she wants EVERYTHING, and according to her since Indiana is a No Fault divorce state that means that she gets everything!  NOT!  She just better be glad that Indiana is a no fault divorce state because I am sure she doesn't want my Dad trotting out her boyfriend that got fired for hiring in and working on under someone else's name, or the fact that he has since left her to go back to a pregnant girlfriend and she has another boyfriend already.

Push me too hard and I can get pissy! This is just a bunch of garbage.  The only reason she wants a continuance is so that she can continue to live her life with the comforts of all the equipment that Dad would gt in the divorce, or to cover up the fact that she is out there selling off all of Dad's stuff! How do we stop this? How do we get things going and get this were it needs to be? i am just so angry!